Saturday, March 28, 2009

Mood Changes After Rape

I have noticed, as well as others I am sure, many changes in my mood since the rape.

I knew my shortcomings prior to the rape, and yes of course I had my moods, just like anyone else. This is quite different.

Some days it is just one mood, happy, depressed, indifferent, and edgy. Others alternate frequently throughout the day. I can wake up depressed and be fine in hours or vice versa. I can go from happy, to sad, to angry, to indifferent, and back to happy all in one day.

Now I know that if any Doctor or Psych person were to read that, they would like to slap a mental illness label on it.

However, I am on antidepressants, and as I said I was aware of my shortcomings prior to this. I did have some depression and anxiety, prior to the rape.

At first I concerned myself with a mental problem, but after thinking it through, I realized how much my external environment has to do with it. Some of the days, I could not figure out why I was so depressed or agitated. So I took an evaluation...........

After being raped, losing security, home, job, income, civil rights, etc. I believe many may be a little up and down for a while. When I read further on Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, and Rape Trauma Syndrome, it helped to confirm that perhaps I was just as normal as I should be due to the circumstances.

My conclusion, I want to stop trying to "figure it out" go with the positive emotions and try and redirect myself when they are bad. As I type that I do realize that at times I cannot shake the negatives as easily as I write that I want to. But I will do my best.


Victoria Placeo

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