Saturday, April 4, 2009

Advice From a Secondary Victim Of Rape

I don't think there as ever been a post from The Rock, that has been so touching to me as this one........... here is The Rocks Advice:


Forgetting and Remembering

I went through Victoria’s criminal file the other day in order to get it a bit more organized. This file includes medical records, state workforce notices and letters, civil paper and, as its name suggests, all of the papers dealing with the night her rape happened. I re-read her statement from that night. In these last few months I have allowed myself to almost forget in a way the horror that she had experienced that night and in reality, what brought her to me. After 10+ months, we are inseparable. She is my love and my best friend. On occasion I see her hurting and wonder why. Are we not in love? Is she not happy to be with me? What more does she need? I’m very lucky that Victoria is able to tell me that it isn’t me that is upsetting her at times. We as secondary survivors must keep that in mind. We can’t get down on ourselves if our loved one is not happy. We do not know the difficulty that they are going through. We can see it, but indeed, we’ll never know it. Our loved one will probably have bouts of depression and it may be hard for us to understand. We just have to keep on living, keep on being there and most importantly, keep on loving.

-The Rock


Thank You My Rock for Being So Understanding


Victoria Placeo


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