Thursday, April 16, 2009

More Random Writings

As I have wrote in the past at times I just have a notebook I vent in. Certain entries really do express my feelings at a certain time, so I have chosen to share them.

Here is one I wrote a month or two ago:

My sleep is absolutely horrible, I can't sleep and when I do I wake frequently.

I am depressed and I don't know exactly why. Alot of the time I try not to figure it out. It seems that if I try to focus on figuring it out I am just focusing on the negative.

I am on antidepressants and I believe they are doing their job. I believe that much of my depression is external. That is probably why I try to figure everything out. I feel like there is something wrong with me.

If I want to evaluate my life and take a good look at why I feel so bad it is not hard to figure out.

First and foremost I was raped, that is a given. The safety, self-confidence, self esteem has been damaged. I don't like to admit it or focus on it because it feels once like I am focusing on the negative.



That's where I ended, apparently it was to painful or not worth writing at the time, but I think it speaks volumes now.



Victoria Placeo

No comments:

Post a Comment